The Hamster from Hell

This past Friday my sister asked me to take her hamster to work and find it a new home, which was no problem indeed since I had already talked to somone who happened to like hamsters...for the life of me I cannot understand these odd hairy creatures myself..they do nothing but sit in their holding tanks and run around a wheel that takes them no where and for entertainment they fill up their water bowls with the stuff they make nests out of, but that is besides the point I guess...Anyway, so I ask my sis to help me catch this animal who she affectionatly named Fucker...yes, Fucker...so if the name is any indication then the next set of events should be no surprise...I ask her to place this thing in a shoe box that was provided by my mom, she promptly says "I am not touching that asshole, he bites", ok, I think if I put the shoe box in the acqarium then all I have to do is shoo him, sounds simple huh? well not to be so...I put the box in his home and when I go to gently shoo him in, he turns and bites me with all the hate in the world...and I shit you not he was hanging on to my middle finger no less like it was a steak and he had not eaten in days....so before I can process what to do..my mind thinks"shit, he has hold of my finger" and I throw up my hand and scream "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH" yes, it was as bad as anyone can picture it....arm flies up in the air along with Fucker....the next things to occur all seemed to happen in slow motion at least for me, I am sure Fucker does not feel the same.....so he flies in the air and then hits the back of my head on the way down, or actually hits my hair clip and bounces off the bed and proceeds to land on the floor.....wait, he did not die due to this fall on the contrary he scampered off under the bed....yes, I know all you animal activists will think poor thing...let me tell you... I bled like a stuck pig....I look under the bed thinking by now, Fucker will be running off into the sunset and I will have to tell my mom, who thinks that these animals are simply overpriced rats it is running around her home...so I look under the bed and there he is shaking his head and I am sure sticking his little finger at me in sheer hatred. I take the box and finally shoo him in with no problem and put the lid on...ok, so there I am bleeding like I was cut with a knife and mad as hell...all making sense...his name is Fucker, he bit my middle finger and I am left mad as hell.....what a morning..and for all you animal activists let me tell you why my sis named him like she did...up until about three weeks ago we had another hamster..one I was fond of..well one day the demon hamster decides the other hamster did not need his head or torso as much as he did.....oh well.....
Julia